What does it mean to be happy with yourself? – a simple question with a not so simple answer. On this episode of the Boyfreinds Podcast, Jarrod, Melvin, Tony, and Renee discussed what it means to be happy with yourself, by yourself, and for yourself.
Melvin jumped in on the topic first to share what others thought of this question. Before filming the episode, Melvin asked his friends what it means for them to be happy with themselves. There were different answers such as “finding your own lane and being happy finding your purpose in life”, “being able to be your authentic self without caring what someone else thinks”, and “being attracted to yourself.”
The Other Half
Obviously, being happy with yourself can mean a lot of different things depending on who you ask. The hosts also had different opinions on the topic, with Tony feeling that you need to be whole and happy with yourself before jumping into a relationship with someone new. He used the saying of “he’s my better half” as a great example of being whole. When you call your significant other your “better half”, you’re essentially saying that you are the worst half.
Tony believes that your significant other should complete you, they should compliment you. Happiness is a choice and you can wake up choosing to be happy with yourself by yourself. You shouldn’t need to have someone depending on whether you are happy with yourself or not. It will only lead to you being completely dependent on that person and not knowing how to find your own joy or happiness.
While Renee agreed that you shouldn’t depend on someone else to find your happiness, she countered Tony’s point about choosing to be happy. As someone who struggles with mental health, she wanted to highlight that it can be difficult (but not impossible) to wake up in the morning and choose to be happy.
If you’re someone who struggles with finding happiness in yourself, sometimes the best thing you can do is fake it until you make it. Essentially, start complimenting yourself as much as you can, even if you don’t believe it all the way yet. Find new and inspiring positive affirmations to tell yourself everyday. The more you tell yourself that you are beautiful, that you are worthy, and that you are enough, the more you’ll begin to believe it yourself.
Finding Your Happiness
To be your best self, it’s important to not only find what makes you happy. If you are trying to fake it until you make it and saying the positive affirmation “I am a bad bitch”, Tony advised the audience to ask what makes you a bad bitch. When you ask yourself that question, you’ll easily find what makes you happy. When you find what makes you happy, keep doing it and you’ll thrive.
When you find happiness within yourself, you’ll also be more likely to recognize what doesn’t make you happy. The last thing you want is a toxic person bringing you down constantly. Oftentimes, the happier we are in life, the more likely we are to see those toxic people and remove them from our lives. The people in your life should be adding to your happiness, not taking it away.
Jarrod’s final thoughts on the podcast’s topic was to focus on the tasks and hobbies that light you up. If you’re looking to meet someone new or get in a new relationship, he believes that you should try to find someone that likes the same things you do. That way, you’re able to experiment this happiness together rather than depending on each other to give that happiness.To hear more about being too picky and defining your standards, be sure to listen to episode 7 of the Boyfriends Podcast.